I'm so glad that law student at NYU made such effective use of his opportunity to question Justice Antonin Scalia. That's going to bring the justices out to the law schools in droves, I'm sure of it. Thus:

Top 10 Sophisticated & Clever Things You Can Ask If and When Justice Scalia Visits Your Law School*

10. Does Rehnquist sodomize your wife?
9. Tony Tony Bo-bony Banana Fana Fo-fony. Wazzup, dawg?
8. Is it true that if I look up "butthead" in a 1791 American dictionary, it has your picture?
7. What was it like working with Angelina Jolie?
6. What was the framers' original understanding of the word [vulgar epithet of your choice]?
5. Do you address Justice O'Connor as "Sweet Stuff" or just "Baby"?
4. Am I hot or not?
3. Do you think the constitution recognizes a fundamental right to act like a dildo on the federal bench?
2. Where did you end up on the whole pubic hair / Coca-Cola issue? **
1. Who would be the bread on a Scalia Love Sandwich: Betty and Veronica or Destiny's Child?

* i.e., never
** extra credit for my readers born after 1977: what could this possibly mean?

16 Apr 05